Christmas Eve is upon us and it is always a time when I remember my childhood and the wonderful memories I have. Going to Christmas Eve services at my Daddy’s multiple churches, lighting the candles, having family communion at home between services and opening one special gift on Christmas Eve. Those are just a few of the memories that I carry in my heart and in my mind as Christmas Eve approaches. I had such a wonderful childhood and even if we weren’t rich in the eyes of the world, we were so rich in so many other ways.
It is also a time that I reflect upon my loved ones that are no longer with me here on earth. There are so many of my friends who have lost their loved ones this year and I think it is wearing on me a bit when I think about all of them. Because I know the feeling.
Losing my own mother on Christmas Day in 2020 is still one of the most significant life events I have had. There is not a day that. passes that I do not think of my mom and my dad– not a single day. But losing a loved one on an actual holiday that is celebrated is really, really difficult. You can imagine. Every single Christmas song, decoration and card brings a new reminder that she is no longer here to celebrate with us.
But I am not alone and with that I find comfort and offer comfort to those who are missing their someone this holiday. My wish (prayer) is that each one who reads this who has suffered a loss that is causing sadness and pain this season finds some comfort in the good memories that you associate with your loved one.
Give yourself a little time to just be in the moment with your memory and your grief. Thank those who have helped you get to this point in your journey with true gratitude (thank you my dear friends reading this –this Is for you), make sure to take time away from the chaos of the holiday to find a quiet spot to just be in the moment with yourself and your grief, do something that you did with your loved one and start a tradition of doing it in their memory, and maybe, just maybe, you will begin to feel a little bit better. Be thankful that you have the capacity to love deeply. Be thankful that you had someone significant in your life when others cannot say the same. But most of all, be gentle with yourself. Be very gentle with yourself and remember that you are loved deeply.
