Are you ready??? For the week?? For Christmas?? I am happy to say that I think that I am! I “said” I would downsize it all this year since we are kind of in transition. But as usual I lied. Since we are going to be in Florida for the actual celebration I shipped all our packages to our eldest son’s place in Jacksonville Beach. UPS tracking told me that all 4 gigantic boxes arrived last night. Never mind that I sent yet another one out yesterday. Now that one included the cookies and party mix and puppy chow that I couldn’t fit in the other 4 boxes. I did scale back on the baking. I usually make about 15 kinds of cookies and give them away. I made 6 this year. And interesting enough they all had a chocolate theme. Hmmmm.
The other thing that is going on is that we are finally moving Chris’s brother to his sister’s house tomorrow. This will be his last night living in the only home he really remembers. Last night at dinner he seemed to be overcome with an attack of The Sad. We kept asking him if he was okay. He wouldn’t answer us. It really upset me because despite all of our efforts over the past 4 1/2 months of living here with him I don’t think he is ready for the transition. But he has to be. It is what has to happen. We need to get everyone moved on to the next step. The most difficult thing is that he is no longer going to be able to work at Sam’s Club where he has worked for 19 years. Different county, different services, no transportation and that is what has to happen. They have been so incredibly wonderful to him over the years. A bunch of them showed up at both funerals for his parents. Not everyone can say that they have coworkers that care like they do for him.
So even though it is a time for celebrating and being with family and sharing the miracle of Christmas it is going to be yet another sad time. Sad because my husband now has no parents. Sad because our lives are forever changed. Sad because Carlton understands a fraction of how his life is going to change over the next month. Sad because it is just hard to explain.
But maybe I am saddest because I will no longer wake up to my notes…..