They say a picture speaks 1000 words and in this case I have to agree.
What makes me happiest? Time with my family. When we were fortunate enough to have two boys in our 20’s I was the happy mama who was able to stay home with them full time. I loved it. It was honestly all I had ever really wanted to do in my life. While some feminists would frown on my aspirations it was and still is one of the best things I have ever done.
Of course it isn’t for every one and it is a luxury that not all can do but for me it was my life. I had a husband who supported me and so our marriage was probably different than many marriages in the 80’s and 90’s. It was more of the type of marriage from days gone by with gender specific roles. I was “in charge” of the house and all that went with it and Chris was in charge of providing for our family. It worked. It worked really well.
When I look at roles today I realize that what we had in those years of raising the boys was truly not what everyone else experienced and certainly not what the norm is today. And you know what? That is okay. It is perfectly fine. It is how we can all be different and still the same. But for me it was my job.
I used to think that putting down “housewife” on forms was a little bit demeaning. It suggested I had no ambition, no goals and no drive. That is so far from the truth. I had lots of goals and drive – it just wasn’t in the paid work environment. I dare say I was as busy in those years as any other woman who was working a regular paid job.
Today I am choosing to not be in the work force and haven’t been for years. I worked when I needed to work, when the family needed me to work and when the job was right. From baby-sitting to doing all the administrative work in the family business to church secretary to church outreach and volunteer worker I did a lot during those years. But now my role has shifted to being the one who is available. Available to be there for my family and my extended family. Available to go help out when someone needs me. What a gift that is.
We just had a wonderful week in Florida with our immediate family. Time with my boys and their beloveds has become one of the things I look forward to the most. I like to think that they like to be with us as well and I think I am pretty spot on with that. We don’t get to see each other that much as one couple lives in New York City and one in Jacksonville, Florida but we make it a priority to spend quality time together. It’s what makes this mama happy.
Life is so short. I am reminded of that daily. I choose to spend my life spending as much time with these two guys (and Chris, of course), making memories and remembering past memories.
What makes you happiest? Is it family? Is it work? Is it something else? Tell me all about it in the comments section. All comments on the blog this month mean a 50 cent donation to the Dementia Society of America. You can read more about it by clicking here.
