Yesterday marked the two month anniversary of my mom’s death. Christmas will never look or feel quite the same for me again. Yesterday I shared about our first visit with our grandson and today I am thinking about the circle of life.
When Theo was born in November my mom was starting her decline and eventual transition to heaven. The birth of Theo began a new life just as my mom was winding down 91 years of hers. I had shared with her first that Theo was coming and she promised to keep my secret which I know she did. I so wish she would have been able to have met him but I know that I can tell Theo all about her as the years go by.
Grief is such a weird thing. I must admit to feeling a bit euphoric after spending the weekend with family after so many months. Meeting our first grandchild was absolutely amazing and we are so excited for his future. And then I woke up on Thursday thinking – “It’s the 25th.” And the waves of grief just came crashing over me.
I jotted the above quote down when we were re-watching The Wire this past month. It seemed very appropriate and accurate. Grieving is essential – no matter what the loss – but it is also important to not let it consume you forever. Life goes on and somehow we have to find a way to fit the grief in around all of the other stuff. The other stuff is what is important as well and it is so important to keep that other stuff around.
I decided to embrace the day, experience the grief, but also made time and room to be outside in our wonderful 70 degree weather . It was a wonderful diversion and allowed me the chance to leave room for some of the other stuff. What a gift I received when I was able to center my grief and allow room for all of the other things in my life. God is good. All the time.
19 Comments
Leave a commentThinking of you! Love you!
Thanks so much!
Leaving room. What great advice! Sending hugs! xoxo
I loved the idea of leaving room. Thanks for the hugs!
This is so true. We need to leave room for other things and people in our lives. When my dad passed away 13 years ago, my grandddaughter gave birth to my first great granddaughter the day we held his memorial service. We had the minister incorporate it into the service as an example of the circle of life. I know it helped mom deal wth her loss as it was a new baby for her to dote on. Her first great great granddaughter! Oh the stories you can share with Theo. xo
What a lovely way to incorporate a birth into the service. It is how I keep thinking –Theo is the beginning of a new chapter and my mom had turned her final page. I will be fine but sometimes things just hit me. I know you miss seeing your mom. Thank goodness you have people who can video chat with you and let you see her.
I so appreciate that I can talk to her from time to time. There has been an outbreak of the virus at Mom´s care home but she is Ok. Still a worry. Sending hugs.xo
Thinking of you. Virtual hug.
Tonya, thank you so much. I really appreciate all the outpouring of love.
Thank God our mom’s are always with us! My mom would have turned 100 in 2018 but she died in 1998. The lessons I learned from her are many and the questions I would ask her are too! Bless you today and always!
Thanks, Jill. I know what you mean. My daddy passed in 1994 and I just don’t go a day without wishing I could ask him something. It is just part of the process and now with my mom I feel it more intensely.
I wish she had been able to meet her great grandson too…but it’s probable that she was right there with you when you met Theo.
I agree! I talked to him about her. 😊
This is such good advice. We must allow ourselves to grieve, which is a process. It takes time and I doubt we ever fully release grief. But then joy edges in as it should with you and Theo. What a blessing. Like Theo with your mom, my mother-in-law never met our son. She died several months before his birth. And she so badly wanted a grandson. Unfortunately she never knew the baby was a boy (we didn’t know) as she died unexpectedly at age 59. Hugging you and loving you even more today, dear friend.
Momma has been gone for 48 yrs and I still have my moments of grief and I hope I always will. With the grief there is precious memories I never want to forget. Over the years much room has been left for wonderful stuff full of love & happiness. Much I know Momma will have approval of. Beth Ann, you are in my thoughts & heart.
Twenty three years now since my soulmate died and each day I find something else to fill the gap. Life does go on and while grieving, we must certainly make time for other things
I am so sorry for your loss— it is definitely not easy.
Thinking of you too – this week WandaVision and the movie Nomadland dealt with grief in ways that impacted me in a good way too
Thanks— those are both on my to watch list!